she lives!

so i'm no longer dying of some rare undetectable virus. i do know that if my liver ever fails, it'll either be from the alcohol consumption or the constant od-ing on ibprofen when i'm sick. at least i'll know. glad to be feeling better, i hate being sick...i ran out of people to complain to (note to self: find more friends/aquaintances so i can later bitch to them) angelica was so sweet and brought me soup which also helped.

ugh i'm going to be the death of myself. ok maybe my word vomit is...i should've just stopped talking but no i had to keep going. *sigh* oh wells i guess. it was one of those moments where as soon as the words left my mouth (mouth= fingers typing in a text message) and i hit send i KNEW that was a bad idea. *sigh* i was doing so well too. i guess i can play crazy and pretend like i never said it. whatever, moving on.

idk what else to say...cool thing of the week coming soon...as soon as i get off my lazy bum.

*here's to having a better rest of the day..

awkward is as awkward does.

think the title is pretty self explanatory.

i've finally grown out of my 12-13 year ugly duckling stage...unfortunately my awkwardness is still here..lord have mercy am i one awkward person. this whole "i'm into you but not sure how into me you are but i want to hang out with you anyway but i don't know how to approach you without sounding like a crazy lady because i don't know how you feel" thing is not what's up.

maybe it's all the drugs i'm on because of my cold...most likely not, but i can pretend right?

i think what i'm gonna do from now on is when i meet a guy give him a business card that says "just a quick heads up i'm super awkward so if i handle situations in a weird way that's why. i'm not a crazy lady, i just haven't developed the necessary social skills to be a functioning adult"

lord help me
i should probably stop talking about myself...i really do love myself i swear..i just have these moments

ps everytime i sneeze a layer of my throat comes off, a piece of brain becomes detached AND my eardrums explode...yes i am dying from a cold. rare i know



lol

mercy mercy me!

whew lordy.

once again thank goodness for friends!!! bree and angelica both had to talk me down from the crazy lady/neurotic thoughts level i was on today as a result of this weekend. yes i am still a little concerned and yes my mind is still going a mile a minute at times, but i'm not as "wowuwah aaahh" as i was earlier. (that's my interpretation of crazy lady speech lol)

in other news..tuesday should be interesting being in class with newboy after what happened this weekend. here's to hoping my worst fears won't come true.

we shall see we shall see.

btw i wish i had taken a picture of the outfit i wore on our date, not to toot my horn but i looked pretty good..his compliment on it was the icing on the cake.

sidenote: i've had this song stuck in my head ALL day. oh robin thicke...mmh mm! this man is soo so sexy...especially when he talks..and when he sings of course. he and paula patton are SO adorable together. his song sex therapy gets me everytime.

hmm..

sometimes things happen not according to whatever plan you constructed in your head. these said things you can't take back. unfortunately life doesn't have a rewind/undo button. unfortunately you have to suck it up and deal with it. choices were made.

(and no you can't pretend like people don't exist)

oh boy...

went on date with new boy last night

had fun

got drunk...billigerent drunk

acted a fool

still had fun.


sigh.


this time i'm for real about not drinking anymore..for real for real.


ok not really, but i promise i'll be on my bestest behavior from now on.

heartbreak warfare

dear john mayer,

why must you be a racist douchebag? i really liked your latest album. heartbreak warfare was my favorite song. but no then you had to go say that shit in your playboy interview. broke my heart..especially considering how long i boycotted you after you won best new artist grammy instead of craig david! i eventually let go of my pride and became a fan. then you betrayed me. after the interview i stopped listening to your music out of protest, but then on the car ride home for spring break your heartbreak warfare song came on and i realized how much i missed your music. but now i'm torn: if i went back to listening to you (secretly of course) does that make me a bad person or should i still not listen to you? it's really hard. it's like when i felt bad for still liking chris brown's song forever after the whole rihanna thing. but anywho guess i'll figure it out. but someone definitely needs to knock you down 3 or 4 levels...you kinda fell in the deep end awhile back.


-sydney

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bursting at the seams right now!!



new boy may or may not have asked me to be his date to a friend's art show friday night...



ok he did!!!!!!!!





i'm kind of freaking out right now, because it came out of nowhere and he was so sweet about it and i really like him and think he's cute...so yea. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!